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There is no one, unilateral stance on feminism and BDSM, whether someone is being dominant or submissive; whether women have partners who are men, women, both or neither. For decades, there has been a lot of feminist conversation around it and other aspects of sex with a lot of varied opinion…

You know people really are all very different, and usually when we try to compare one partner with those of our past we miss the mark by a long shot because of those differences. So lets break your question down into a few different parts and take things one at a time. Let’s take the big question…

The murder of abortion provider Dr. George Tiller on May 31st has resulted in a lot of conversation about abortion. It’s a topic frequently hushed, or spoken about more around its politics than the actual procedure, the experience itself and the real women who have abortions. So this increased discussion is certainly something potentially positive happening because of something horribly tragic. However, often in these conversations and news stories, language is used that’s confusing or inaccurate, and some statements are made about abortion or women who choose abortion which are false, unrepresentative or misleading. And any of this can come from either “side” of abortion debates or discussions, due to political aims or motivations, ideological ideas or agendas or just out of plain old ignorance.

Short answer: Absolutely, yes. There could be—and likely are—plenty of other reasons why your boyfriend does not want to do sexual things with you. Longer answer: Our decision about whether to have sex, or whether to engage in any type of sexual behavior is rarely the result of a single factor. It’s…

If I only had a dollar (heck, even a quarter) for every time a young person wrote into Scarleteen to ask us if we think they might be [fill in a sexual orientation here], I’d be pretty freakin’ wealthy. This is in no way to make light of your question to us, more just to let you know that this is…

A website where people who have given birth of all ages, shapes, sizes and nationalities can share images of their post-pregnancy bodies so it will no longer be secret; to see what people really look like sans airbrushes and plastic surgery. What if the next generation grows up knowing how normal…

All of us who work at clinics that provide abortion, or as abortion or reproductive rights educators or advocates know we do so at substantial risk. Women who come to our clinics as clients also know that they, too, may be at risk. The slaying of Dr. Tiller yesterday is tragic and upsetting, but it is not surprising or new. We didn’t become scared for the first time yesterday. We’ve always been scared, and we have always had cause to be scared. The murder of Dr. George Tiller at his church yesterday morning – based on the information we have so far – was domestic terrorism, and terrorism which has been known and prevalent for some time.

Very sad news: A prominent abortion provider, George Tiller, was shot and killed this morning inside his church in Wichita, Kansas. He was one of the few remaining doctors in the US who perform therapeutic late-term abortions after 25 weeks (to 28 LMP). Unfortunately, Dr. Tiller was regularly targeted by radical anti-abortion groups; his clinic was bombed in 1986 and he was shot and wounded in 1993.

It’s amazing how well my generation - those in their late teens and early 20’s - can distance themselves from topics that have everything to do with us. For example, driving fatalities and alcohol abuse. It’s staggering the number of teens who die from car accidents related to substance abuse, as well as those who spend their high school and college years with a beer bottle in hand. It’s even scarier to look at how many teenagers don’t know BASIC FACTS about sex and sexuality. This is something I’ve known for a long time as a Scarleteen staff member, but it doesn’t change reality.

A friend dying is usually a really big deal, especially when you’re young and death isn’t expected like it is when we’re 60, 70 or 80. While young people can sometimes feel like their lives are going to be short, I think it’s safe to say few people actually expect anyone’s life to end when they’re…

I hate, hate, hate that phrase. Nearly everywhere I go or look as a young adult sexuality educator anymore, I run into it incessantly. Let me be clear: I don’t hate doing all that we can, to help people of every age to avoid pregnancies or parenting they do not want or do not feel ready for. I’m so glad to do that, and it’s a big part of my job at Scarleteen and elsewhere when I work as a sexuality and contraception educator and activist.

Libido – the desire for sex of any given kind – is a very complex thing, much like sex and sexuality are complex. It’s emotional, it’s intellectual, it’s chemical and physiological, it’s both personal and interpersonal, it’s spiritual, it’s metaphysical, it’s historical, it’s aspirational. Our…

It’s normal for a woman’s body to respond to anything she finds pleasurable, and every woman’s body responds in similar yet different ways. What you’re really talking about here is arousal. What we know about sexual response is that there is a basic cycle – generally referred to as the sexual…

I only rented Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist recently, so I know I’m behind the curve on this one. But I just had to say something. I loved this movie. I loved it as a person just chilling out on her couch wanting to watch something good, and I loved it even more as someone who works with and for teenagers and young adults. When I looked up the director, I was unsurprised that I’d liked it so much. Peter Sollett also directed Raising Victor Vargas, which is one of the best, most honest and real coming-of-age films I’ve ever seen.

I’ve continued to enjoy TED videos, featuring people like Aimee Mullins, and my interest really doesn’t seem to be subsiding any time soon. TED is the “Technology, Entertainment, Design” conference who’s video talks and lectures are released on-line every weekday. Most recently, my thoughts on it…

This project began as after this blogger, a self-identifying feminist with vulvodynia, became fed up with the available information about FSD from a feminist perspective! There are relatively few discussions about this topic on the internet, despite the fact that up to 43% of women experience some…

I’ve watched a few lectures from the TED conferences which have been put online this year and really enjoyed most them, even if I do disagree with some of the speakers on what they say… I just watched the following video where Aimee Mullins, an amputee, athlete, actress and model speaks on what…

Earlier this week, I drove over to my very awesome local sexual health clinic, willingly had my upper left arm anaesthetized, and got a matchstick-sized piece of plastic jammed under the skin just for the heck of it. Well, okay, not exactly… What I really did was get Implanon inserted, and it was…

In American society we often grow up with baseball as THE metaphor to describe sex. Let’s deconstruct the baseball model, uncover its many flaws, and take a look at an alternative which is a whole lot better, even if it might make you a little hungry.

When we have any kind of trauma, we don’t tend to heal by blocking it out. Of course, we generally cannot simply “block out” memories by sheer force of will in the first place. But it’s certainly common to wish we could. By all means, you had extremely poor care at the hospital – I hate even…

This is about a recent scare of mine at the dentist or how a misdiagnosis almost cost me hundreds of dollars and unnecessary pain and surgery. However, before I talk about that specific experience, I’d like to share my back story. How I love thee, dentists of the world!?! Let me count the ways.

For starters, congratulations for seeking treatment and starting on your road to recovery. You deserve major recognition for that; it’s not easy but taking those first steps are so important, if hard, and I’m really proud of you! My quick answer to your two questions is that you are definitely not…

Patient Teenagers? A Comparison of the Sexual Behavior of Virginity Pledgers and Matched Nonpledgers, Janet Elise Rosenbaum, PhD, AM; Health Policy PhD Program, Harvard University: Five years after the pledge, 82% of pledgers denied having ever pledged. Pledgers and matched nonpledgers did not differ in premarital sex, sexually transmitted diseases, and anal and oral sex variables. Pledgers had 0.1 fewer past-year partners but did not differ in lifetime sexual partners and age of first sex. Fewer pledgers than matched nonpledgers used birth control and condoms in the past year and birth control at last sex.

Contraception. In many ways, it’s the bane of my existence. Kids are just not part of my plan right now, and as much as I wish it were possible, the technology to shut my ovaries off at will for any length of time has not yet been developed. (Anyone who figures out how to do that will have my eternal gratitude. I might even make them cupcakes, I would be so grateful.) So, seeing as how I’m with a partner of the opposite sex, some sort of pregnancy prevention is required.

Breakups sure can suck. But you can get through them, and come out on the other side okay.